First, let me start by saying that I have been the biggest proponent of portable video that has ever lived. So, you can just imagine the thrill I got when Apple reversed their recent stance and released their latest iPod that now supports video. I knew it would happen eventually and am trying hard not to sound smug. As usual, I was first in line as soon as the announcement was made - first in line, that is, to put my name on the waiting list. Turns out I had to wait a week to get my meat hooks on the device... and I am going to weave in some of that experience with this review.
While I Waited...
I was impressed with the complementary announcement that TV shows would also be available for the iPod, but I already had my mind set on creating video files from the media I already owned. It seemed like only seconds after Jobs' talk that articles began springing up on the web about how to convert pretty much anything (DVD, home movies, TV shows, etc.) to iPod-compatible forms. I went with one such guide because it used a software product with which I had a great deal of confidence.
So every day, all day, I ripped and converted my video content and filled up a directory in anticipation. I upgraded to iTunes 6 and successfully imported my video into the Library. Let me tell you that the process was surprisingly easy, but it took a very long time. My first movie, something something Lebowski, had to be kicked off overnight but I figured would be worth the wait. Next, I had the brilliant idea of ripping the entire first season of Arrested Development, but converting separate, half-hour episodes actually took longer because the process required more attention.
As my iPod video library grew, my patience withered, until....
I Get the Call
Thursday morning, Mark from the Apple Store leaves me a voicemail. I panicked a bit when he started with, "Mr. Jones, your 30 gig iPod - no wait - 60 gig iPod is in." I had reserved the black 60GB version (of course) and there was no way Mark was prepared for the wrath that would have ensued had I been teased with 30 fewer gigabytes. The first chance I got, I headed over to the store to pick it up.
I grabbed the first employee I saw and ordered him to produce my precious. After disappearing for what seemed like a giga-eternity, he returned with a tentative look. He calmly explained that there was a mix-up and that they, in fact, did NOT have my 60GB black iPod. Turns out they had every other variety but the one I wanted - and this is where the story takes a sharp turn down, and through what would turn out to be, the many levels of hell.
After throwing what can only be described as a man-sized tantrum, I finally settled with a 30GB black iPod. All while cursing Mark and vowing to re-appear at a future date with an open-box return with an un-dull scimitar. Sure, I was probably going to lose the battle and pay the 10% restocking fee, but there was no way I was going to wait any longer to try this thing out.
The Wait is Over
It is going to take me longer to write this than it took to perform the actions described here. You might save yourself some time by skipping to the end of the article - just look for the heading, "Train Wreck".
Now I'm not saying I am impatient, but I opened the box on the way back to the car and plugged it into the laptop before I even closed the door. On the walk back, I did turn it on, and I was disappointed that there was no content pre-loaded on the device. Nothing. No sample music, no hi-res photos to create that love-at-first-sight moment with the new, larger screen, and worst of all... no video clips! Not even a Pixar short! Strike one.
Of course, iTunes recognized the new iPod and even showed the right color icon (black) in the left column. I'm sure this impresses the newbies, but I had witnessed this many times; the latest time was only weeks before when I first plugged in my new (black) iPod nano... yeah, the scratch-laden replacement for my iPod mini. I immediately clicked over to the videos in iTunes and dragged over the entire collection. Within seconds, a pop-up dialog appeared which reported, "Ain't no way in hell you are going to play those videos on your shiny new 30GB ipod. And, what's with the 30GB, are you some kind of wuss?" Alright, I may be paraphrasing, but the message came through loud a clear; all my efforts over the past week had been futile. None of the new video conversions had worked, despite having followed the instructions precisely. A more insightful friend would later question how I could have been so confident in guides that were published before they could possibly have been tested - but hey, I was caught up in the moment and didn't have time for such reflection.
After recovering from a big strike 2, I realized that some video had actually made the leap over the chasm and was happily residing on the new iPod. Great, I thought! At least I will be able to see something. These videos had come along with recent iTunes Music Store purchases, as they have begun to spruce up the online album purchases with digital booklets and music videos. What was weird was that I couldn't find them under Music Video, but instead under Movies. I tried in iTunes to retag them but could not. Foul Ball.
Video Killed ... My iPod Buzz
Within minutes of playing with the new video features, I was well on my way to full-on depression. First, the device was unusually sluggish as I navigated around the different video files. At one point the video playback actually hung while the audio rolled on! Even the frozen image of Fregie on my screen while the Black Eyed Peas continued to "Pump It" was not enough to temper my frustration. I quickly discovered that I was not going to be using that fancy scroll wheel to navigate through the video. You can only use the |<< and |>> buttons... and they don't work that well. And finally, I was surprised to find that, unlike music, video playback stops when browsing for another selection. I tried hard (well not that hard) to think about why this was necessary, but ultimately decided that this was strike 3.
As a put the iPod back in its box, I swear I saw a huge scratch appear on the 30-minute old unit. As I watched, the scratch seemed to spread until it covered every inch of the device! It was probably just my imagination, and the fact that 3 weeks after buying the black nano I still did not have a way to protect that puppy.
Train Wreck
By the time I made it home, I was a mess. Here was the perfect chance to throw it back in the collective faces of my detractors who had laughed at me when, 3 years earlier, I had proudly paraded my Archos AV340 around the office, showing off my favorite movies and TV shows. They agreed it was cool, but felt that portable video was impractical. But, when Jobs flip-flopped and announced this new creation, I just knew my time had come. As it turned out, my first impressions were, at best, unfavorable.
I decided to put a night's sleep between me and the inevitable trip back to the Apple Store. I did sharpen the scimitar before I went to bed... just in case.
