My Name Is Peter, and I'm An App User

An iPhone App user, to be exact.  I'm starting to feel like I've become some kind of social pariah simply for owning and using my iPhone.  Since when do I have to explain myself?  I guess it's because a lot of iPhone users are jerks.

I saw this article today, about those who have become "app-noxious."  Some of the behavior is deplorable, but I'd like to make my case for iPhone apps... when used with some sense.

Some People Need To Be Corrected

Yes, it's true.  We've all known this person, the know-it-all who's really a moron.  Opinions are opinions and facts are facts.  Intelligent individuals know where to clarify and draw the line.  That guy who absolutely (and rudely) insists that his knowledge is superior to yours, even though you can prove he is incorrect, needs to be put in his place.  Your iPhone can help with that, app or no app.  So do it.  Correct them, unless there is a downside to doing so (i.e., they are your boss, your wife, a dating prospect, someone to whom you owe money, someone who's armed, etc.) 

No matter how loud, dominating, overpowering, or pompous said individual is, your iPhone will level the playing field and make you look as smart as you actually are.  It also keeps you on the straight and narrow, since you know that if you verify that you yourself are wrong, you'll look like an even bigger tool than the other guy.

You Don't Have Time To Search Forever For Things

When I want to find a restaurant or venue, why search forever when I can just use an app?  It saves time and is likely to give you a good answer.  And if it doesn't, oh well - what did you lose?  The app was free, and it took virtually no time to download or run.

They're Often Free And Can Even Save Time and Money

Oh yeah, tons of these apps are totally free.  Why not use them?  In an economic downturn, one cannot afford to pass up saving time (and possibly money) by taking advantage of a useful, free app.  Quicken Online is a great example of a useful, free app that could help you save time and manage your money, but I'm sure I could think of many others.

Fart Apps Are Hilarious

Don't knock them, they're absolutely hilarious when used effectively.  Just don't overdo it... the law of diminishing comedic returns applies here.

Your iPhone Can Be A Multi-Tool Of Sorts

Rather than carry around a level, a photo editor, a mirror, a flashlight, a recipe book, a bartender's guide, a Chinese-English dictionary, and a stack of business cards all separately, why not use apps?

Just Don't Be an App-Hole

As with most things in life, balance is key.  Don't run around telling everyone that you know which restaurants are within 5 miles of where you're sitting, how many calories are really in that salad, or similar obnoxious behavior - it doesn't make you a better person, it just makes you "that guy."  You can validate your self-worth through other accomplishments, such as hard work or spending time with your friends and family (i.e., not constantly staring at your phone.)

Instead, use the tools your iPhone gives you, sensibly, to bestow upon yourself the gift of efficiency and expanded, at-your-fingertips knowledge.

Oh yeah, and please don't go waving it about like a $200 lightsaber (yeah, there's an app for that, Darth) saying "my iPhone can do what your XXXXX phone can't." 

Whether it's actually true or not, it's just rude, perpetuates a stereotype, and gives Apple haters another bullet to load into their ever-expanding magazine.


Connect With Techlore